Can You Be Friends with Your Ex After a Breakup

Have you recently broken up a relationship with somebody? Do you think you would ever be able to stay friends with them? In a recent poll conducted, it is estimated that up to half of the people stayed friends with their ex partners. Even if you had irreconcilable differences with your ex partner, you may still want to give friendship a try. As to whether things would work out, it would depend on your different personalities and previous events. There might be painful memories that both of you wish to avoid by contacting each other.

Establishing Friendship with Your Ex Partner

The first thing to realize is that friendship may not be the best option in some situations. It may also be advisable to give it some time before contacting your ex partner. If you try to do this too soon after you have broken your relationship, you may have false hope things would work out again and set yourself up for despair. There may be feelings of anger or accusations may fly around. It is best to leave it until both of your emotions have settled and you are ready to move on. Some ex partners just don’t want to be in touch with you again and you should respect that and keep your distance. You can do some gentle probing with emails or text messages to see if you want to get together again.

Once you have arranged to meet and decide to stay friends, then you can allow your relationship to deepen. Make sure to avoid subjects that are painful to you and remain polite at all times. It is also advisable to avoid intimate jokes or excessive contact initially until you are both settled into your new roles. If your ex partner remains moody or angry then it is probably better to take some extra time off as he or she may not be ready.

Maintaining your Current Relationship

Once you have got out with your ex partner a few times, it is time to decide whether you want to remain friends in the long term. Maintaining friendship with your ex partner can be tricky if you are involved in another relationship. You must make the issue very clear to all parties involved that it is just pure friendship. There may well be an element of jealousy even from mature partners so explanation must be given that you are not into another relationship with your ex partner. Avoid doing anything that would arouse suspicion with your current partner, such as staying our late or sending too many text messages to your ex partner.


Maintaining friendship with your ex partner can be achieved but would depend on the individual circumstances. The timing is crucial and both of you must be ready to accept the new change. Making things clear to your new partner is absolutely vital such that no misunderstandings occur.